He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
