I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
