Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
