If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
