found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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