Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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