Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
