Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
