YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
