Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
