They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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