Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
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I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I think i got beer on your cat.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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