After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize