I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
