Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
