We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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