oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
