There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
