I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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