i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
