At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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