she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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