i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
