Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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