Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Boobs speak an international language.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
