Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
