It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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