take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Come see our sink grown plant.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize