There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
