He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
