Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
