haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
