Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...