The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
