hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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