she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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