i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
BRING THE BAGELS
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
