Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
