but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
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I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize