he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
