...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
