sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
