I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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