I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
