Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I faked an abortion last night.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
