she woke up with a sticky ear
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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