Do vagina's smell?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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