You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
