let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
