A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
