Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
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